Why do we do this to ourselves? It puts me in mind of very worthy and disciplined couples who decide not to indulge in the joy of full sex until they are married. They heavily 'pet' and nearly go the whole way, but not quite, if you see what I mean. A bit like reading all the road tests and buying cleaning materials.

I once waited 4 years - 4 bl**dy years for a new car once, not even a proper car, a toy car, a Caterham 21, they only ever made 50 of them, uh oh, hang on, would someone remind me how many ARP4's were made? I see a theme developing here....................

[Beginning to get the best out of the ARP4]