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#516312 - 05/06/18 08:48 AM Re: Tongue in cheek Monday humour [Re: Neilda]
sospan Offline
Charter Member

Registered: 31/05/10
Posts: 5104
Loc: Llanelli
Originally Posted By Neilda
Originally Posted By sospan
My ex vet mate just called.....
After a long search he got a job in a circus. A human cannonball.
He just got fired.
They’ll have a hard time finding a replacement with his calibre.


Was this the bloke who used to work on the dodgems? He was eventually sacked, but sued for funfair dismissal.




I'm here all week.



He waltzered off into the sunset?
Got a new job in another funfair and became a big wheel in the organisation.


Edited by sospan (05/06/18 08:49 AM)
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#516499 - 06/06/18 09:57 AM Re: Tongue in cheek Monday humour [Re: sospan]
pandy Offline

Talk Morgan Sage

Registered: 12/04/11
Posts: 6499
Loc: West Paris, France
Originally Posted By sospan
My ex vet mate just called.....
After a long search he got a job in a circus. A human cannonball.
He just got fired.
They’ll have a hard time finding a replacement with his calibre.


As Basil Brush would say, "Boom boom".
_________________________
Giles. Mogless in Paris.

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#517187 - 11/06/18 08:16 PM Re: Tongue in cheek Monday humour [Re: +8Rich]
+8Rich Offline

Member of the Inner Circle

Registered: 15/12/09
Posts: 15258
Loc: Devon UK

Blonde one...

_________________________
Richard
1999 Indigo +8






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#517276 - 12/06/18 01:46 PM Re: Tongue in cheek Monday humour [Re: +8Rich]
athelstan Offline
Learner Plates Off!

Registered: 10/02/13
Posts: 316
Loc: Kent, England
Thank you Richard. Priceless!
_________________________
John
Plus 4 Panama Green

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#517479 - 13/06/18 06:08 PM Re: Tongue in cheek Monday humour [Re: athelstan]
Peter J Offline
Formerly known as Aldermog
Member of the Inner Circle

Registered: 13/08/13
Posts: 10121
Loc: Salisbury, UK
A young girl from Donegal leaves home to find work in the bright lights of London. She comes home 6 months later and steps out of a taxi wearing a full-length mink coat.

"Begorrah, Colleen," says her mother. "Tis a lovely soft coat yer wearin' an' it looks so expensive. Where did ye get that?"

Colleen replies, "Sure now, I won it at the bingo. Don't they have wonderful prizes in London?"

When the weekend's over, Colleen returns to the bright lights, but she's back to visit her mom a few months later. This time, when she steps out of the taxi, she's wearing a beautiful gold wristwatch and a large diamond ring.

Same exchange with Mom...same "Won it at bingo! "

Colleen returns to the bright lights again. A few months later, she's back. This time she's sporting a beautiful emerald and diamond necklace with matching bracelet and earrings. She hands her mother 1,000 pounds and explains that she won it all in bingo. Then she asks Mom to run her a bath as she needs to freshen up.

When Colleen gets to the washroom, there's only a quarter inch of hot water in the bathtub. Colleen, a wee bit peeved at her Mom being so cheap with the hot water after being handed 1,000 pounds, calls downstairs, "Mom! Sure now, didn't I ask you to run me a bath? There's only a quarter inch of water in the tub!"

"There is, me darlin," replies her Mom. "But we don't want ye gettin' yer bingo card wet now, do we?"
_________________________
Peter,
Tarka the 'Otter Mog
2014 Plus 8



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#517482 - 13/06/18 06:26 PM Re: Tongue in cheek Monday humour [Re: +8Rich]
bmgermany Offline
L - Learner Plates On

Registered: 15/08/14
Posts: 213
Loc: Northern Germany
Bingo!


(As we say in in Germany in a situation like this!) rofl
_________________________
4/4 year 2005 and a lot of HONDA CX500.......

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#517504 - 13/06/18 08:14 PM Re: Tongue in cheek Monday humour [Re: +8Rich]
sospan Offline
Charter Member

Registered: 31/05/10
Posts: 5104
Loc: Llanelli
Marie from Limerick was heavily pregnant....due to give birth any day. She was out for the day but...it happened...
She phoned her mother
“Ma, I think me waters are broke! Help me!”
Ma replied... OK Marie I will get someone to you...where are you ringing from?”
Marie, in panic answered..”from me minge to me ankles!”


Excuse the terminology... smile
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Red Plus8

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#517507 - 13/06/18 08:22 PM Re: Tongue in cheek Monday humour [Re: Peter J]
+8Rich Offline

Member of the Inner Circle

Registered: 15/12/09
Posts: 15258
Loc: Devon UK
Originally Posted By Peter J
A young girl from Donegal leaves home to find work in the bright lights of London. She comes home 6 months later and steps out of a taxi wearing a full-length mink coat.

"Begorrah, Colleen," says her mother. "Tis a lovely soft coat yer wearin' an' it looks so expensive. Where did ye get that?"

Colleen replies, "Sure now, I won it at the bingo. Don't they have wonderful prizes in London?"

When the weekend's over, Colleen returns to the bright lights, but she's back to visit her mom a few months later. This time, when she steps out of the taxi, she's wearing a beautiful gold wristwatch and a large diamond ring.

Same exchange with Mom...same "Won it at bingo! "

Colleen returns to the bright lights again. A few months later, she's back. This time she's sporting a beautiful emerald and diamond necklace with matching bracelet and earrings. She hands her mother 1,000 pounds and explains that she won it all in bingo. Then she asks Mom to run her a bath as she needs to freshen up.

When Colleen gets to the washroom, there's only a quarter inch of hot water in the bathtub. Colleen, a wee bit peeved at her Mom being so cheap with the hot water after being handed 1,000 pounds, calls downstairs, "Mom! Sure now, didn't I ask you to run me a bath? There's only a quarter inch of water in the tub!"

"There is, me darlin," replies her Mom. "But we don't want ye gettin' yer bingo card wet now, do we?"


clap clap Brilliant..
_________________________
Richard
1999 Indigo +8






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#517527 - 13/06/18 09:57 PM Re: Tongue in cheek Monday humour [Re: +8Rich]
Stewart S Offline
Wave & smile... It's a Morgan
Needs to Get Out More!

Registered: 14/06/14
Posts: 8920
Loc: Lancashire, England
Good one
_________________________
2008 British Racing Blue (ahem!) 3 Litre, 4 Seater

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#517853 - 15/06/18 11:12 PM Re: Tongue in cheek Monday humour [Re: +8Rich]
+8Rich Offline

Member of the Inner Circle

Registered: 15/12/09
Posts: 15258
Loc: Devon UK

Fatboy happy at last..

_________________________
Richard
1999 Indigo +8






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