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Virus Alert levels #624145
19/03/20 06:05 PM
19/03/20 06:05 PM
Joined: May 2015
Posts: 268
North Yorks
John07 Offline OP
Learner Plates Off!
John07  Offline OP
Learner Plates Off!

Joined: May 2015
Posts: 268
North Yorks
Found this on another forum, thought you might like it.

hi All,

A pal just sent me this, it may lighten things up a bit!

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to the recent virus threat and have therefore raised their threat level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, the level may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.”

The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out.The virus has been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let's Get the Bastard.” They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are “Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout loudly and excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”

The Germans have increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbour” and “Lose.”

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its alert level from “No worries” to “She'll be alright, Mate.” Two more escalation levels remain: “Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!” and “The barbie is cancelled.” So far, no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

Re: Virus Alert levels [Re: John07] #624150
19/03/20 06:48 PM
19/03/20 06:48 PM
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 25,615
Devonshire
+8Rich Offline
Member of the Inner Circle
+8Rich  Offline
Member of the Inner Circle

Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 25,615
Devonshire

Very good - I'm awaiting the snowstorm now grin2


Regards Richard

1999 Indigo Blue +8
2009 4/4 Sport Green prev
1994 Connaught Green +8 prev





Re: Virus Alert levels [Re: +8Rich] #624153
19/03/20 07:03 PM
19/03/20 07:03 PM
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 96
Norfolk
D
DJC Offline
Just Getting Started
DJC  Offline
Just Getting Started
D

Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 96
Norfolk
Thanks for sharing that - made me laugh out loud for the first time in what seems like ages!!!
David C

Last edited by DJC; 19/03/20 07:04 PM. Reason: Fingers not Keeing up with brain!!
Re: Virus Alert levels [Re: John07] #624156
19/03/20 07:23 PM
19/03/20 07:23 PM
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 204
E
Esprit Offline
L - Learner Plates On
Esprit  Offline
L - Learner Plates On
E

Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 204
rofl roflk rofl brilliant stuff!!!!!


Tom
2018 Plus 4
Re: Virus Alert levels [Re: John07] #624158
19/03/20 07:30 PM
19/03/20 07:30 PM
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 5,505
East Anglia
madmax Offline
Charter Member
madmax  Offline
Charter Member

Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 5,505
East Anglia
Politically incorrect ..? sherlock


Geneva 2016 plus 8' The Green Godess' 4 side exits .


Re: Virus Alert levels [Re: John07] #624168
19/03/20 07:58 PM
19/03/20 07:58 PM
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014
The frozen North
J
Jack The Lad Offline
Posting Desperado
Jack The Lad  Offline
Posting Desperado
Talk Morgan Guru
J

Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014
The frozen North
ROTFL STILL LAUGHING .

Re: Virus Alert levels [Re: John07] #624196
19/03/20 09:46 PM
19/03/20 09:46 PM
Joined: Dec 2018
Posts: 903
North of Stamford, UK
HeadlessBlue Offline
Talk Morgan Regular
HeadlessBlue  Offline
Talk Morgan Regular

Joined: Dec 2018
Posts: 903
North of Stamford, UK
Hysterical
Thanks so much for posting 🤣
HB


Awaiting Plus Four, prev 110 Plus 4 - “Florence”
Tesla Model 3 AWD LR - “Ernie”
A3 S Line
Re: Virus Alert levels [Re: John07] #624205
19/03/20 11:18 PM
19/03/20 11:18 PM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,252
Suffolk
John V6 Offline
Member of the Inner Circle
John V6  Offline
Member of the Inner Circle

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,252
Suffolk
Great stuff


JohnV6
2006 Indigo Blue Roadster S1
2014 Brooklands Edition Roadster "Brookland's Belle"
Re: Virus Alert levels [Re: John07] #624547
21/03/20 02:12 AM
21/03/20 02:12 AM
Joined: Feb 2019
Posts: 2,762
Port Orchard, WA.
LightSpeed Online content
Talk Morgan Expert
LightSpeed  Online Content
Talk Morgan Expert

Joined: Feb 2019
Posts: 2,762
Port Orchard, WA.
I love that list, but admittedly identify with the Scots


Stephen
2019 M3W

Re: Virus Alert levels [Re: John07] #624557
21/03/20 07:23 AM
21/03/20 07:23 AM
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 3,773
Australia - NSW North Coast
OZ 4/4 Offline
Talk Morgan Addict
OZ 4/4  Offline
Talk Morgan Addict

Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 3,773
Australia - NSW North Coast
Originally Posted by John07
Found this on another forum, thought you might like it.

hi All,

A pal just sent me this, it may lighten things up a bit!

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to the recent virus threat and have therefore raised their threat level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, the level may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.”

The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out.The virus has been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let's Get the Bastard.” They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are “Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout loudly and excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”

The Germans have increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbour” and “Lose.”

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its alert level from “No worries” to “She'll be alright, Mate.” Two more escalation levels remain: “Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!” and “The barbie is cancelled.” So far, no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.


I am pleased to confirm although Bondi Beach (and others) are now closed, the barbie is still on - for now
And quite frankly, it's time to cancel that......


A Morgan Identified Fastidious Owner...
2011 4/4 Bespoke, 1981 Delorean, Auburn Boat Tail

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