Nearly FridayThere was a guy and he comes to this town and gathers together all the people that lived in the town. He notices they're all blondes. So he says if one of you will come up here and answer one of these questions right I will give you 500 dollars. So a blonde comes up.
He says I will give you three chances to get a right answer. So he says okay What's 1+1. She says "Easy, 3". The crowd of blondes says "Give her another chance!" So he says okay what's 2+2. She says "Easy, 3". And the crowd yells "GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!" So he says okay, final chance, and he says what's 6-3?. She says "Easy, 3". And the crowd yells even louder "GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!!! GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!!! "
There were a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead on an island. It was ten miles to land, and they decided to swim for it. The brunette swam 6 miles, and then drowned. The redhead swam 8 miles , then drowned. The blonde swam 9 miles, thought she couldn't make it, and swam back 9 miles.
A blonde went to an electronics store. she asked a clerk "How much is that TV" the clerk said "Sorry, we don't serve blondes". so she went home and dyed her hair brown. she went back to the store. she asked "how much is that TV" the clerk said "sorry, we don't serve blondes". she went home and dyed her hair red. she went back to the store. "how much is that TV" "sorry, we don't serve blondes". she went home and dyed her hair black and went back to the store. "how much is that TV" "Sorry, we don't serve blondes". So she asks "How do you keep on finding out that I'm a blonde?" So the clerk said "Because that TV is actually a microwave."
What's dumber then 2 brunettes building a house underwater? 2 blonds trying to burn it down.
Two brunettes and a blonde escape from prison. To get away from the cops they run into an abandoned farmhouse. In the farmhouse there were three big empty sacks lying on the ground. So they hid in them and when the cops came to the farmhouse, one of the cops sees the sacks and he decides to kick all the bags to check them. The officer goes and kicks the one with the brunette in it, and she says "meow". The officer says "Oh there's just a stupid cat in there". So he kicks the one with the other brunette in it, and she says "Woof Woof". The officer said "Oh its just a stupid dog". Then he kicks the sack with a blonde in it and she says "Potatoes"
Did you hear about the blonde who committed suicide? The cops came and found the first 5 bullet holes were in the mirror.
There was this blonde and she wanted to get her hair done. She went to a hairdresser and asked to get her hair layered. As she was wearing headphones, the stylist had to work around them. When the stylist got to the top of her head, he asked her to take off her headphones. She paid no attention. Finally, after he asked her two more times and she still didn't listen, he took them off himself so he could finish. When he did, the blonde fell over, and was dead! The stylist picked up her headphones to find out what she was listening to, and the recording said over and over again, "breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out..."
A blonde, and brunette, and a redhead are being chased by criminals with guns. They first surround the brunette. Then they say "Ready... Aim" and the brunette screams "FLOOD!" and they all get scared and look around, so the brunette escapes. Then they surround the redhead and say "Ready... Aim" and the red head screams "TORNADO!" and they look around and she escapes. Then they surround the blonde. They yell "Ready... Aim" and the blonde screams "FIRE!"
She was so blonde she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept
Two blondes were on their way to Disneyland when they saw a sign that said 'Disneyland, Left' so they figured it wasn't there, turned around, and went home
Why do blondes wear green lipstick? Because red means STOP.
The blonde missed the number 44 bus so she took the number 22 bus twice
Why did the blonde put ice cubes in her freezer? To keep the fridge cold.
Why couldn't the blonde make ice cubes? She forgot the recipe.
Why did the blonde have only one sock on? She forgot how many she was supposed to have on.
A brunette and a blonde are walking down the street. The brunette says "Oh, look, it's a poor dead bird!" The blonde looks up in the sky and says "Where?"
Did you hear about the blonde with an I.Q. of 2?
She was pregnant.
What is the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?
There have actually been sightings of Bigfoot.
Sent to me today by a Blonde female colleague now that's equality 
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