Stuart I dont write dirty books . I once remember my old man saying about a chap he had a lived in face he had seen life not avoided it . Try as I have I never seem to walk a straight line there is always somthing to stop me its an everyday thing that I accept . I was at the baths on sat night ( in a swimming club ) while walking past the loo I heard a banging . I had to help a mate out, the door had stuck fast yet it was on un-engaged . I said to my wife we would never be rich but we would never be dull money can't buy that they think I am the village idiot but I can get them laughing in seconds by acting stupid its comes with ease . My mother is in hospital last week while standing with my wife a nurse called Julie Roberts ( sounds almost the same as the actor ) was chatting me up she was stunning . A few nights later again standing with my wife one ran over and gave me a huge cuddle , cant blame her can you she has good taste . I said when I die and get shoved in the crem there will be a gas strike and those doors will refuse to work. But I never ever loose my sence of humour. Lifes for living and you only get it once so laugh at what it throws at you good or bad enjoying every bit,and I have said to Steve I was the quiet very shy one of my mates . Heres one before I go as a 16 year old we went to the local Catholic Sunday night school dance . Lemonade and music and GIRLS OF COURSE why else go . At half time we shot out to the nearest pub had a beer and ran back . The Rolling stones was being played and they needed a group to get on stage and mime . We all had the the same front tooth missing Bob it was kicked out by a horse , Brian punched out in a fight, Jack I dont know . Me came off my bike head first. I was Mick Jagger doing strutting my stuff while my mates where behind me pretending to play the instruments .All was going well on the dark stage with the spotlights on us , till my false tooth shot out I knew I would stand on it while trying to get off my cloud and doing his moves . I bent down to pick it up and fell over my mates started to crack up at me it was not long before all of us are on the floor in stitches Jacks trousers split open .Oddly we gave everyone a belly laugh but we did not win .
Originally Posted By twotribes
Jack - stop polishing that car of yours and start writing your memoirs before your memory begins to get gaps. I'd definitely buy a copy if it's anything like as funny as what you post on here...
if my mind is correct was there not a F1 sponsored by Durex a good few years ago.
Yup, you are right, The London Rubber Company in the guise of Durex sponsored the Surtees team in 1976.
They also sposored the Suzuki Bike Racing team in the late 80s. I was issued with some team kit, including a splendid jacket that looked just like one of their product packets. Also, note the number on the bike in the foreground!
LRC also sponsored our local ice cream van -on the side it said "Buy me and stop one"!!! Ah - the old ones are the best (so I keep telling SWMBO) Reminds me of my days teaching sex ed (in sign language!!) - Mates sent us some condom demonstrators packed in mint flavoured rubbers. I wrote back to say thanks for the demonstrators & thanks for the chewing gum - it blows great bubbles - no reply - some folks have no sense of humour.
I like it, reminded me of when I worked in Zeven in Germany just up the road was a johnny factory and their name for it was Gummiwaren fabrik which does sound more like something you might put in your mouth and chew.
Originally Posted By PhilRoyle
LRC also sponsored our local ice cream van -on the side it said "Buy me and stop one"!!! Ah - the old ones are the best (so I keep telling SWMBO) Reminds me of my days teaching sex ed (in sign language!!) - Mates sent us some condom demonstrators packed in mint flavoured rubbers. I wrote back to say thanks for the demonstrators & thanks for the chewing gum - it blows great bubbles - no reply - some folks have no sense of humour.
2009 4/4 Sport Henrietta 1999 Indigo Blue +8 2009 4/4 Sport Green prev 1993 Con Green +8 prev
My pal that worked for Benneton F1, subsequently Renault F1, now Lotus said this morning he was going to have a lot more time on his hands soon. At a guess, he wont be trekking over to the other side of Chipping Norton for much longer...
Sad if that spells the end of the team.
It won't be the first time if I recall correctly. Didn't Lotus pull out of F1 in the early 90's? I have a Benneton pit crew pocket patch in my possesion, but that is another story.
I was a field engineer for IBM many moons ago. I had LRC as a customer. I remember the first day when I was sent on a visit. Somewhat intimidating. Large workforce of mature women. As I walked down the production line a lady pulled a "random test" one out of a packet from the production line and without looking had it on a metal test "willy" in one move. As I walked past she turned to the woman next to her and said "oh look fresh meat". I walked faster.
Top Gear - did I miss something, were there ANY car tests ? Time to put it out of our misery.
I hope Lotus does get back in the game this year. They did well considering the budget last year.
Everyone loves a Morgan. Even me, unless it's broken again.
My pal that worked for Benneton F1, subsequently Renault F1, now Lotus said this morning he was going to have a lot more time on his hands soon. At a guess, he wont be trekking over to the other side of Chipping Norton for much longer...
Sad if that spells the end of the team.
It won't be the first time if I recall correctly. Didn't Lotus pull out of F1 in the early 90's? I have a Benneton pit crew pocket patch in my possesion, but that is another story.
Lots of teams have pulled out of F1 over the years. The Lotus you are thinking of has / had nothing to do with the current Lotus. Different organisation altogether.
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