or find a chap with a wooden leg (OooArrrgh!).
Now you've got me going Dave

.
You have reminded me of that Fairy Tale Lateral Thinking Exercise where:
'you picture the scene inside a cottage with a smiling dwarf looking in through a window. In the room is another dwarf, dead, hanging by the neck from the lamp cord'.
On the floor is a walking stick and a little pile of sawdust. The exercise is to work out how all of this scene occured????