|
1 members (deano),
154
guests, and
15
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Old Book
by Morganmike - 21/09/26 07:54 PM
|
|
|
|
|
Forums39
Topics49,940
Posts838,604
Members9,638
| |
Most Online1,063
Jun 14th, 2026
|
|
|
There are no members with birthdays on this day. |
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 14,751 Likes: 158
Member of the Inner Circle
|
Member of the Inner Circle
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 14,751 Likes: 158 |
AN AUSSIE stockman and his wife had just got married. He’d left everything till the last minute so they found a nice hotel after their wedding and hoped to wing it. True story. I'm not quite the aussie stockman but on the night after my second wedding I booked a hotel in the beach village of Red Head just south of Newcastle in NSW. What I did not know was that it was more a motel than anything else and attached to a popular pub for young surfies. We arrived late after a long day and a long drive and were a bit surprised to discover our room was in a row of a single story brick building that was open to the carpark. At one o'clock in the morning a couple of kids sat on the outside window sill and after about 15 minutes of listening to him imploring for her to give "it" to him and her not quite refusing I opened the door and said to her "For Ch**st's sake take him down the beach and give it to him or go home and ***** yourself, but at least let us get some sleep" Needless to say we found a quieter hotel for our next night.
Peter ![[Linked Image]](http://bradley.it/public_images/drive.jpg)
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,015 Likes: 1
Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
|
|
Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,015 Likes: 1 |
By hell you look young to have a mog .  The Wife said she would love to go and see the Jeremy Kile show, so i got her sister pregnant....... we are on on Tuesday. 
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 37,499 Likes: 996
Tricky Dicky Member of the Inner Circle
|
|
OP
Tricky Dicky Member of the Inner Circle
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 37,499 Likes: 996 |
A farmer in Yorkshire sees a bloke drinking from his stream &
shouts: "Ey up cocker, tha dunt wanna be drinkin watta frum theer,
its full o hoss p**s an cow s**te."
The bloke says: "Sir, I am an illegal immigrant,can you
be speaking clearer, and slower please."
The farmer replies: "If.... You.... Use.... Both.... Hands.... You....Won't... Spill ....Any"
2009 4/4 Sport Henrietta
1999 Indigo Blue +8
2009 4/4 Sport Green prev
1993 Con Green +8 prev
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,647
Talk Morgan Enthusiast
|
|
Talk Morgan Enthusiast
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,647 |
The doctor advised me to cut out about half of my sexual activity.
"Which half doc?" I asked. "Thinking about it or talking about it?"
Jaguar F-Type V6s roadster
2009 Harley Davidson XR1200
1986 Honda VFR750F (RC24)
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,647
Talk Morgan Enthusiast
|
|
Talk Morgan Enthusiast
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,647 |
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
Jaguar F-Type V6s roadster
2009 Harley Davidson XR1200
1986 Honda VFR750F (RC24)
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,647
Talk Morgan Enthusiast
|
|
Talk Morgan Enthusiast
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,647 |
As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what?
You have been with me all through the bad times.
When I got fired, you were there to support me.
When my business failed, you were there.
When I got shot, you were by my side.
When we lost the house, you stayed right here.
When my health started failing, you were still by my side...
You know what Martha?"
"What dear?" she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.
"I'm beginning to think you're bad luck."
Jaguar F-Type V6s roadster
2009 Harley Davidson XR1200
1986 Honda VFR750F (RC24)
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 28,918 Likes: 354
Salty Sea Dog Member of the Inner Circle
|
|
Salty Sea Dog Member of the Inner Circle
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 28,918 Likes: 354 |
A friend of mine joined the new Tesco Dating Club.
However, I would seriously counsel against it.
He got a "Bag for Life".
Graham (G4FUJ)
Sold L44FOR 4/4 Giallo Fly
'11 MINI Countryman Cooper D All4
'90 LR 90 SW
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 4,333
Gone to Porsche Part of the Furniture
|
|
Gone to Porsche Part of the Furniture
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 4,333 |
Dentist about to treat a patient.Deantist:- roll your sleeve up sir Patient:- Why what are you going to do Dentist:- i need to put this in your arm (big needle) Patient:- oh sorry i don't do needles Dentist:- but sir you need this to supress the pain Patient:- no sorry have you anything else Dentist:- here i will give you some of this (Gas) Patient:- oh sorry i cant do Gas neither Dentist:- ok take this (Dentist hands him a Viagra) Patient:- "Viagra" i didnt know this will numb my mouth Dentist:- it doesnt Sir, but when it kicks in it will give you something to hang on to.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,015 Likes: 1
Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
|
|
Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,015 Likes: 1 |
They now do a liquid viagra . Does nothing for the male libido but it dont arf keep your biscuits hard after dunking 
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 9,560 Likes: 135
Needs to Get Out More!
|
|
Needs to Get Out More!
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 9,560 Likes: 135 |
It's Friday humour so.........
One Friday a couple were driving along a country road in a downpour when a skunk ran out and they hit it.
They man got out and saw it was alive.
He picked it up and handed it to the woman and said
"We'll get it to a vet."
"But it's cold and wet and shivering" , she said.
He replied
"Well put is somewhere warm."
"Where?" she replied
"Between your legs" was his reply.
"But what about the smell?" she replied aghast!
He replied...
"Pinch it's nose then!"
Plus Four MY23 Furka Rouge
|
|
|
|
|
