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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014
Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
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Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014 |
A very tall man walks into a bar, and a lady recognizes him as a real Rugby player .
They start to talk and eventually go back to his place .
They start to kiss, and the man takes off his shirt .
On his arm, he has a tattoo that says REEBOK.
"What's that for?" the lady questions.
"Oh, I have this so that when I'm on TV, people will see my tattoo, and Reebok pays me".
Then the man takes off his trousers , and on his leg, he has a tattoo that says NIKE.
"What's that?" the lady questions again.
"Just like the Reebok tattoo, I get paid when this tattoo is seen on TV".
The man drops his underwear and on his penis he has a tattoo that says AIDS .
The lady screams: "Don't tell me you have AIDS!"
The man replies: "No, no ...!!! Calm down....!!!
it will say ADIDAS in a minute."
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 4,328
Gone to Porsche Part of the Furniture
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Gone to Porsche Part of the Furniture
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 4,328 |
 i wish !! 
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Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 477
Learner Plates Off!
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Learner Plates Off!
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 477 |
Passed that farm on many occasions Dave and in many different types of weather. An odd situation indeed but now a real 'landmark'.
Dave
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 1,242
Has a lot to Say!
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Has a lot to Say!
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 1,242 |
Did here about the farmer who was out standing in his field
Graham
Waking up is a good start to the day !!
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014
Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
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Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014 |
After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve. "So , how is everything going?!inquired God.
"It is all so beautiful, God",she replied. "The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just one problem .
It's these breasts you have given me. The middle one pushes the other two out and I am constantly knocking them with my arms , catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. They're a real pain!. and Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body came in pairs , such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc.
She felt that having two breasts might leave her body more "symmetrically balanced ".
"That's a fair point ", replied God. But it was my first shot at this,you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that you needed only half of those , but I see you are all right. I will fix it up right away.
and God reached down , removed the middle breast and tossed it into the bushes .
Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden of Eden ..
"Well, Eve, how is my favorite creation ?"
"Just fantastic!, she replied , "But for one oversight. You see , all the animals are paired off .
The ewe has a ram and the cow has her bull . All the animals have a mate except me . I feel so alone",.
God thought for a moment and said, " You know, Eve, you are right. How could I have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will immediately create a man from a part of you . Let's see... where did I put that useless Tit?.
NOW DOESN'T THAT MAKE MORE SENSE THAN ALL THAT CRAP ABOUT THE RIB?
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014
Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
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Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014 |
Thats a load of Bull Did here about the farmer who was out standing in his field
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,646
Needs to Get Out More!
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Needs to Get Out More!
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,646 |
After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve. "So , how is everything going?!inquired God.
"It is all so beautiful, God",she replied. "The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just one problem .
It's these breasts you have given me. The middle one pushes the other two out and I am constantly knocking them with my arms , catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. They're a real pain!. and Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body came in pairs , such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc.
She felt that having two breasts might leave her body more "symmetrically balanced ".
"That's a fair point ", replied God. But it was my first shot at this,you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that you needed only half of those , but I see you are all right. I will fix it up right away.
and God reached down , removed the middle breast and tossed it into the bushes .
Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden of Eden ..
"Well, Eve, how is my favorite creation ?"
"Just fantastic!, she replied , "But for one oversight. You see , all the animals are paired off .
The ewe has a ram and the cow has her bull . All the animals have a mate except me . I feel so alone",.
God thought for a moment and said, " You know, Eve, you are right. How could I have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will immediately create a man from a part of you . Let's see... where did I put that useless Tit?.
NOW DOESN'T THAT MAKE MORE SENSE THAN ALL THAT CRAP ABOUT THE RIB? Coo. I really didn't have JTL down as a feminist.
Giles. Mogless in Paris.
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014
Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
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Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014 |
My daughter had me going through Canal street Manchester last Sunday . It turned me to Feminism very fast. 
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 1,242
Has a lot to Say!
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Has a lot to Say!
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 1,242 |
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather  .. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
Graham
Waking up is a good start to the day !!
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 35,773 Likes: 468
Tricky Dicky Member of the Inner Circle
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OP
Tricky Dicky Member of the Inner Circle
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 35,773 Likes: 468 |
Another from a mate in NZ for the Internationally broadminded.
A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale hit the Middle East. Two million Muslims died and over a million were injured.
Iraq and Iran are totally ruined and the governments don't know where to start with providing help to rebuild. The rest of the world is in shock. The USA is sending troops to help.
Saudi Arabia is sending oil.
Latin American countries are sending supplies.
New Zealand is sending sheep, cattle and food crops.
The Asian continents are sending labour to assist in rebuilding the infrastructure.
Canada is sending medical teams and supplies.
GREAT BRITAIN, not to be outdone, is sending two million replacement Muslims.
2009 4/4 Henrietta 1999 Indigo Blue +8 2009 4/4 Sport Green prev 1993 Connaught Green +8 prev
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