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Aug 24th, 2023
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Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 5,013 Likes: 32
Charter Member
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Charter Member
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 5,013 Likes: 32 |
V good..... I was wondering how it would end! 
+8 4.8
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Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 2,054 Likes: 18
Talk Morgan Expert
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Talk Morgan Expert
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 2,054 Likes: 18 |
V good..... I was wondering how it would end! With a punchline, maybe?
Regards
Alan
AP08 MOG
2016 Plus 4 GDi - Mazda Soul Red Metallic
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 209
OXR 5 L - Learner Plates On
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OXR 5 L - Learner Plates On
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 209 |
DEAR SANTA
Dear Santa,
How are you? How is Mrs. Claus? I hope everyone, from the
reindeer to the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I
would like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone 4 for
Christmas. I hope you remember that come Christmas Day.
Merry Christmas,
Timmy Jones
*
Dear Timmy,
Thank you for you letter. Mrs. Claus, the reindeer and the elves are all
fine and thank you for asking about them. Santa is a little worried
all the time you spend playing video games and texting. Santa wouldn't want
you toget fat. Since you have indeed been a good boy, I think I'll bring you
something you can go outside and play with.*
Merry Christmas,*
Santa Claus***
* *
Mr. Claus,
Seeing that I have fulfilled the "naughty vs. Nice" contract,
set by you I might add, I feel confident that you can see your way
clear to granting me what I have asked for. I certainly wouldn't want to turn
this joyous season into one of litigation. Also, don't you think that a
jibe at my weight coming from an overweight man who goes out once a year is
a bit trite?
Respectfully,
Tim Jones
* *
Mr. Jones,
While I have acknowledged you have met the "nice" criteria,
need I remind you that your Christmas list is a request and in no
way is it a guarantee of services provided. Should you wish to pursue legal
action, well that is your right. Please know, however, that my attorney's
have been on retainer ever since the Burgermeister Meisterburger incident and
will be more than happy to take you on in open court. Additionally, the
exercise I alluded to will not only improve your health, but also improve your
social skills and potentially help clear up a complexion that looks like the
bottom of the Burger King fry bin most days.
Very Truly Yours,
S Claus
* *
Now look here Fat Man,
I told you what I want and I expect you to bring it. I was attempting to be polite about this but you brought
my looks and my friends into this. Now you just be disrespecting me. I'm about to tweet my boys
and we're gonna be waiting for your fat ass and I'm taking my game
console,my game, my phone, and whatever else I want. WHAT EVER I WANT, MAN!
T-Bone
* *
Listen Pizza Face,
Seriously???
You think a dude that breaks into every house in the
world on one night and never gets caught sweats a skinny G-banger wannabe?
"He sees you when you're sleeping; He knows when you're awake". Sound familiar,
genius? You know what kind of resources I have at my disposal. I got
your dermot wired, Jack. I go all around the world and see ways to hurt people
that if I described them right now, you'd throw up your Totino's
pizza roll all over the carpet of your mom's basement. You're not getting what you
asked for, but I'm still stopping by your crib to stomp a mud hole in
your ass and then walk it dry. Chew on that, Petunia.
S Clizzy
* *
Dear Santa,
Bring me whatever you see fit. I'll appreciate anything.
Timmy
* *
Timmy,
That's what I thought you little bastard.
Santa
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 4,328
Gone to Porsche Part of the Furniture
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Gone to Porsche Part of the Furniture
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 4,328 |
Brilliant  .......just what i end up saying to the kids really 
Last edited by Dean-Royal; 21/12/12 03:17 PM.
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Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 14,723 Likes: 149
Member of the Inner Circle
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Member of the Inner Circle
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 14,723 Likes: 149 |
That really the best man. Gimme five.
Peter ![[Linked Image]](http://bradley.it/public_images/drive.jpg)
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,646
Needs to Get Out More!
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Needs to Get Out More!
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,646 |
Top notch TTC. For those who enjoy Aussie culture, (as I do) it slightly puts me in mind of Kevin Bloody Wilson's song Santa Claus you xxxx. DON'T CLICK THIS LINK IF YOU'RE OFFENDED BY BAD LANGUAGE ETC. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ElPs9NLZoUY
Giles. Mogless in Paris.
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Joined: May 2010
Posts: 220
L - Learner Plates On
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L - Learner Plates On
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 220 |
Aussie culture? I was once told that the difference between Australia and a yoghurt is that if you leave the yoghurt long enough you get a culture...........
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Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 519
Talk Morgan Regular
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Talk Morgan Regular
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 519 |
Aussie culture? I was once told that the difference between Australia and a yoghurt is that if you leave the yoghurt long enough you get a culture...........  Neil.
1975 4/4 4 seater, cream over blue; Q3 Quattro; Bicycle; Walking poles.
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Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 4,491 Likes: 65
Part of the Furniture
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Part of the Furniture
Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 4,491 Likes: 65 |
Never heard of Kevin Bloody Wilson -so had to look him up. This short interview gives a quick insight and I found it very funny. Again - swearing so don't watch if you don't like bad language. http://youtube.com/watch?feature=related&v=bgCNa2HCg74#/watch?feature=related&v=bgCNa2HCg74
2021 Lapis Blue Plus 6  You know it makes sense!  2016 Carmine Red 991.2 C4S
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014
Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
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Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,014 |
OLD IS WHEN.....
Getting lucky means you find your car in the parking
OLD IS WHEN.....
An all nighter means not getting up for a pee .
Old is when.....
Getting a little action means I dont need to take any fibre today.
OLD IS WHEN .....
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot....
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