Talk Morgan Forums Community The Malvern Arms Tongue in cheek Monday humour

now something completely different...

Often overlooked intimes quarantine.
You do unusual things to your stuff at home.
Give your chessmen private time - they need it...



A school mate did this nearly 30 years ago...

"Outside the NHS, Postmen are the most at risk because they have to go door to door! Still have to touch all the letterboxes which is not something you would sanitise! Please spray some dettol on your knockers, bells and letterboxes so we keep our postmen safe".
Ladies, please respect this advice.

Bugga, I've been found out!

It’s obviously because every post of mine for 6 years has been serious, entirely sober and without even the merest hint of frivolity

An Oldy but a Goldy - : Anagrams
We need a clever diversion at this stage

Someone out there
Must be "deadly" at Scrabble.
(Wait till you see the last one)!

PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT


THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
I'M A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE


AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:

MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER

Tescos, good, occasionally busy later.
Sainsburys, moderate to good, sale on corn flakes.
Asda, slight to moderate, heavy crowds by evening.
Marks and Spencers and Co-Op, fair.
Waitrose fair to moderate, spillage in aisle 7.
Lidl, rough at first, moderate later.




And that's the end of the Shopping Forecast.

Why you should waer gloves & wash your hands after filling the car.

Thanks John, I can't unsee that now yuck y doo what a minger..

Taken your mind off the virus though