Talk Morgan Forums Community The Malvern Arms Lockdown Consequentials

We should have been in the Highlands this week.

Arriving in Fort Augustus Friday from Ullapool, and departing for home tomorrow, Sunday. The weather up there this week, has been pretty dire, and today and tomorrow, the area around Fort Augustus will get a month's rain.

The rest of this week wasn't much good either, so at least we haven't watched stunning weather unfolding all week like we had in 2018.

In addition, we saw my Mother off on Thursday...……….Aged 93, and still living at home, she had taken a huge turn for the worse on Feb 14th, spending the whole night on the bedroom floor. Since 15th Feb we've had five 999 Ambulance call outs, and I've been interacting with large numbers of paramedics, nurses, carers and so on. It has been a real challenge, managing self isolation but at the same time doing what has to be done.

Up to 14th Feb, she had no assistance, but from then it was carers, plus a medication Nomad, wheeled trolley, commode, and fall alarm pendant. My mobile phone hasn't stopped ringing for three months, including a call a month ago from the alarm people telling me the power was off at her house. She was in hospital as it happened. I went over...….both neighbours were OK, but no power inside her house.

A neighbour had equipment to check the box, and there was nothing coming in from the road. The mains have recently been re-laid in the road...……..
I rang the emergency number for electric...105, and within 3 hours met an engineer on site. He found the fault under the front garden and offered to fix it overnight. We agreed they would do it the next morning, and at 0900 I met three engineers on site. After digging a huge hole, the power was restored by lunchtime.

In the meantime, mother had uncontrollable diabetes - Sugar level 37 when she first fell, and a water infection which she never got rid of. Plus a lot of other ailments. So over the last three weeks she slipped away. We couldn't visit. It was too risky. Without exception, the medics/carers we have met have all been quite remarkable people, and we are humbled by their caring and compassionate ways. Her funeral was under Covid rules, so close family only (four of us), and distancing in the chapel. The neighbours all came out to see her off. Three mounted Police saluted her as she was taken to the Crematorium.

All in all it's been one hell of a three months.

What can we say Dave. Losing a parent under normal circumstances is hard to cope with even if the loss is "expected". Under present conditions it must be pretty grim - especially with not being able to gather to say farewell. I know it is little consolation but she had a good innings and I am sure was assured of your love and had the care of the professionals around her. We have lost a couple of members of our church recently and are intending when it is safe to do so to have celebrations and thanksgivings for their lives which were very full and well-lived. This can be a great help in the process of grieving.
For any who are in similar circumstances Cruse is a great organisation and offers support for bereavement.
With best wishes.

Really sorry to hear of your loss. Thoughts are with you and your family.

That is so sad Dave, losing a parent at anytime is awful but it must be really distressing just now.
It's an old cliché but time really is a great healer, the bad memories of the past 3 months will fade and all the happiest will remain with you.
Condolences to you and your family.

So sorry to learn of your loss Dave.
Thinking of you.

Condolences to you and family Dave.
Remember all the good times. The stress of the last few months will fade...

Dave,
as I told you it will get better but this must have been an awful time for you.
John

Life is not kind at the end. Under these rules everything becomes more painful. Best wishes for the time ahead.

My mother passed after my father and she had a number of the problems that sound similar to your mother at the end. She signed the DNR because she said it was time and she no longer enjoyed the time. She felt like she had made the most of her life and hated being a burden. If someone had said that to me years ago I would not have understood. Now I understand what she meant.

When you get one of those little moments think of the best times.

Really sorry to hear of your loss Dave.

As I said earlier Dave reach out for the good bits to lean on they're never far away.

Bless her that is a long time to be suffering from February but as you say she out of the suffering now and on her next big adventure wherever that may be.

I shall remember her from that visit as the funny bright lady that she was for me on that visit, it's what she would want too.

You have had a torrid time of it and you now need to take some time for yourselves and make a nice plan to look forward to.

Take care and stay safe too.