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Salty Sea Dog
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Salty Sea Dog
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Originally Posted By Jack The Lad
Richard dont tell me, you are a happy married man with a family been married to the same girl for years she knows you like a book and just lets you get on with your crazy life and jokes because thats the way you are and she would not have you any other way.
I call it normality to get you through the stress of the day.


Good thing there's some of us left JT! smile


Graham (G4FUJ)

Sold L44FOR 4/4 Giallo Fly
'09 Gen2 MINI Cooper ragtop
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+8Rich Offline OP
Tricky Dicky
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Tricky Dicky
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You have it in one JTL - 43 year relationship and 40year marriage coming up on 10th March this year. Never looked at another woman in a "close" way and not likely to now either.
I am so grateful for the 3 young adults she has nurtured together with the almost unloveable me. Most importantly she is my best mate and that's why she puts up with the crazy side I guess.

I certainly couldn't cope without humour particularly in adversity and sadly we have had our family "fill" of that it's part of the pick yourself up process for us - and yes JTL she has a wild sense of humour and wasn't wired with any limit switches in any areas which makes for an interesting life together.

Regards

Originally Posted By Jack The Lad
Richard dont tell me, you are a happy married man with a family been married to the same girl for years she knows you like a book and just lets you get on with your crazy life and jokes because thats the way you are and she would not have you any other way.
I call in normality to get you through the stress of the day.


2009 4/4 Henrietta
1999 Indigo Blue +8
2009 4/4 Sport Green prev
1993 Connaught Green +8 prev





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Gone to Porsche
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Gone to Porsche
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Explanation for there being no male agony aunts!

Dear Bill, I am a 42 yr old mother. I left for work but after a mile or so, my Lotus grin2 broke down. I had to walk home again, and on arriving home I found my 16 year old babysitter handcuffed to the bed in her school uniform, sucking my husbands C@cK Thumb wink. I am devastated!....Can you help?

Dear Susie, a common cause for this, is dirt in your carburettor. Don't let your fuel drop too low in the tank. Hope this helps.


www.generalpaint.biz/color.php Problem with your Colour, we offer TM members impartial advice.
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Has a lot to Say!
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Has a lot to Say!
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Posts: 1,242
Originally Posted By Dean-Royal
Explanation for there being no male agony aunts!

Dear Bill, I am a 42 yr old mother. I left for work but after a mile or so, my Lotus grin2 broke down. I had to walk home again, and on arriving home I found my 16 year old babysitter handcuffed to the bed in her school uniform, sucking my husbands C@cK Thumb wink. I am devastated!....Can you help?

Dear Susie, a common cause for this, is dirt in your carburettor. Don't let your fuel drop too low in the tank. Hope this helps.


That's the B-----s Dean rofl


Graham

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+8Rich Offline OP
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An oldie but always worth a rerun thumbs

Last edited by 4/4sportsfun; 23/02/13 05:56 PM.

2009 4/4 Henrietta
1999 Indigo Blue +8
2009 4/4 Sport Green prev
1993 Connaught Green +8 prev





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Posts: 209
T
TTC Offline
OXR 5
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OXR 5
L - Learner Plates On
T
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 209
Female weight-lifter goes to her doctor,"I've been taking steroids and it seems I am growing a cock" she says.

"Anabolic" asks the doc.

"No just a cock" she replies.

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Roadster Guru
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Roadster Guru
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Unashamedly pinched from a Lotus forum:

Two policewomen on patrol one winters night with a police dog for company. One complains that she's left her knickers in her locker and she's cold. Her mate says, "well Rex is a sniffer dog. Let him have a sniff of your mufty, send him back to the station and he'll come back with your knickers". Twenty minutes later Rex arrives back with two truncheons, a broom handle and four of the desk sergeants fingers.................


DaveW
'05 Red Roadster S1
'16 Yellow (Not the only) Narrow AR GDI Plus 4
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L - Learner Plates On
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OXR 5
L - Learner Plates On
T
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 209
Sex After Surgery:





A surgeon went to check on his young woman patient after an operation.



"You'll be fine," he said.



She asked ...



“How long will it be before I am able to have a normal sex life again doctor?"



The surgeon seemed to pause, and a small tear ran down his cheek from the corner of his eye, which alarmed the girl.



"What's the matter Doctor? I will be all right, won't I?"



He replied ...



“Yes, you'll be fine. It's just that no one has ever asked me that after having her tonsils out."








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Part of the Furniture
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Part of the Furniture
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Menopause has its benefits!

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2021 Lapis Blue Plus 6 evil You know it makes sense! thinking
2016 Carmine Red 991.2 C4S





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Salty Sea Dog
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Salty Sea Dog
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A man with a bald head and a wooden leg is invited to a
Xmas fancy dress party. He doesn't know what to wear to hide his head and his wooden Leg, so he writes to a fancy dress company to explain his Problem.

A few days later he receives a parcel with a note:

"Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a Pirate's outfit. The spotted
Handkerchief will cover your bald head and with your wooden
Leg you will be just right as a Pirate. "

The man is offended that the outfit emphasizes his disability, so he writes a letter of complaint..

A week passes and he receives another parcel and note


"Dear Sir,
Sorry about the previous parcel. Please find enclosed a
Monk's' habit. The long robe will cover your wooden leg and
With your bald head you will really look the part. "

The man is really incandescent with rage now, because the company has gone from emphasizing his wooden leg to drawing attention to his bald head. So he writes a really strong
Letter of complaint..

A few days later he gets a very small parcel from the company with the accompanying letter:

"Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a tin of Golden Syrup.
We suggest you pour the tin of Golden Syrup over your bald
Head, let it harden, then stick your wooden leg up your a*se
And go as a toffee apple."


Graham (G4FUJ)

Sold L44FOR 4/4 Giallo Fly
'09 Gen2 MINI Cooper ragtop
'90 LR 90 SW
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