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Joined: May 2014
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Black Rat
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Black Rat
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Jeremy Hunt was doing an annual visit to a NHS hospital. As always he was looking for something to beat the NHS with to show how badly run and loss making things were.
While Hunt was checking the books, he turned to the executive of the hospital and said “I notice you buy a lot of bandages. What do you do with the middle of the roll ?"
"Good question," noted the executive. "We save them up and send them back to the bandage company and every once in a while, they send us a free roll. We recycle whenever possible"
"Oh," replied Hunt,, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went, "What about all these coloured casts you dispense. Isn't it rather a waste of money?"
"Ah, yes," replied the executive, realizing that Hunt was trying to trap him. "We ask that any patient wishing a coloured cast donates £1 which is far in excess of the 10p the colouring actually costs."
Hunt was determined to fluster the know-it-all executive.
"Well, What do you do with all the remains from the circumcision surgeries?"
"Here, too, we do not waste," answered the executive. "What we do is save all the little foreskins and send them to the government, and about once a year, at this time, they send us a complete prick."


Keith
2013 narrow bodied + 4 Ruby.
Joined: Aug 2011
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Talk Morgan Guru
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Talk Morgan Guru
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laugh2 laugh2


Bud
4/4 "Stanley"
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 14,976
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Originally Posted By athelstan
Why is it that many F1 drivers have names linked to Scottish towns?

Stirling Moss
Eddie Irvine
Lewis Hamilton
Ayr Town Centre


An old one but a good one!


Richard
1976 4/4 4 Seater
Joined: Apr 2014
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Talk Morgan Sage
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Talk Morgan Sage
Joined: Apr 2014
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Love the Ayr Town Centre.


Best Regards
Lang may yer lum reek
Joined: Dec 2009
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+8Rich Offline OP
Tricky Dicky
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Tricky Dicky
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2009 4/4 Henrietta
1999 Indigo Blue +8
2009 4/4 Sport Green prev
1993 Connaught Green +8 prev





Joined: Jan 2012
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Clever


Richard
1976 4/4 4 Seater
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+1. but it has big words also.


JohnV6
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Excellent stuff !


Geneva 2016 plus 8' The Green Godess' 4 side exits .


Joined: Oct 2012
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N
Talk Morgan Sage
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Talk Morgan Sage
N
Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 6,538
The Jeremy Hunt joke is very good!

Even bigger laugh - he could be Deputy PM today!!

Last edited by NeilL; 08/01/18 09:05 AM.

Neil

Joined: May 2010
Posts: 9,285
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S
Needs to Get Out More!
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Needs to Get Out More!
S
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 9,285
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I have dug up an old joke book from a packing case....brace yourselves!


A young pretty miss waqlked up to the bow legged chemist and asked..
"May I have some talcum powder, please?"
He said...
Yes ma'm, walk right this way."
She replied...
"If I could walk like that I wouldn't need any talcum powder".

Two millipedes were cuddling. The female was reluctant. She crossed her legs and said..
No, no, a thousand times, NO!"


Plus Four MY23 Furka Rouge
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