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Old Book
by Morganmike - 21/09/26 07:54 PM
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Forums39
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Jun 14th, 2026
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 14,976 Likes: 2
Member of the Inner Circle
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Member of the Inner Circle
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Posts: 14,976 Likes: 2 |
Richard
1976 4/4 4 Seater
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,015 Likes: 1
Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
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Posting Desperado Talk Morgan Guru
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,015 Likes: 1 |
Bert you better run  its Sat m/ing and is on the war path . Read this and came out with the following. A beer does not do the shopping , cooking , make the bed, ironing. ETC ETC ETC . 
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 37,499 Likes: 996
Tricky Dicky Member of the Inner Circle
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OP
Tricky Dicky Member of the Inner Circle
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 37,499 Likes: 996 |
A Texan in Australia
A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, 'Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large.' Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, 'We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows.' The conversation has, meanwhile, almost died when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field. He asks, 'And what are those?' The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, 'Don't you have any grasshoppers in Texas?'
2009 4/4 Sport Henrietta
1999 Indigo Blue +8
2009 4/4 Sport Green prev
1993 Con Green +8 prev
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 14,976 Likes: 2
Member of the Inner Circle
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Member of the Inner Circle
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Posts: 14,976 Likes: 2 |
Richard
1976 4/4 4 Seater
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Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 266
Learner Plates Off!
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Learner Plates Off!
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 266 |
My brother who is a carpenter just told me this one, I hope it does not loose to much in the translation:
Accuracy of measurement:
- a carpenter, working as a cabinet maker, works accurately to milimeters.
- a carpenter that builts up a roof, works accurately to centimeters.
- regarding bricklayers, you have to take care that they stay on the site
2015 4/4 "Chaplin" in black and white, usually strolling around at the german north sea shore
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 3,643
Talk Morgan Addict
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Talk Morgan Addict
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 3,643 |
Ralf, that translates well.
Ian
2011 Plus 4
Wild Mogs Reims 2019, Goodwood 2018, Isle of Man 2017, Carried on to Caramulo" 2016
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 14,976 Likes: 2
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Member of the Inner Circle
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From the BBC News Website today about the French President:
What's the penalty for bigamy? Two wives.
It's a bit like: first prize one week in Norfolk, second prize two weeks in Norfolk!
Richard
1976 4/4 4 Seater
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,646
Needs to Get Out More!
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Needs to Get Out More!
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8,646 |
From the BBC News Website today about the French President:
What's the penalty for bigamy? Two wives.
There was a thing Radio 4 that made me smile, saying that in the case of Valerie Trierweiler, when she is referred to as "France's first Lady", they don't mean it in the same way as, for example, Michelle Obama is "America's first lady". They just mean that she is the first one of the president's five-a day.
Giles. Mogless in Paris.
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Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 14,751 Likes: 158
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Member of the Inner Circle
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Would you believe sent me this one?! I hope she's not trying to tell me something  Sixteen Logical Reasons Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:
1. The later you are, the more excited your dog is to see you. 2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name. 3. Dogs like it if you leave lots of things on the floor. 4. Dogs' parents never visit. 5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across. 6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go, instantly, 24 hours a day. 7. Dogs find you amusing when you're pissed. 8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing. 9. Dogs won't wake you up at night to ask: "If I died, would you get another dog?" 10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and sell 'em. 11. When you drop a silent one, dogs don't run around frantically with room spray. 13. Dogs never tell you to stop scratching your balls. Instead, they sit pondering why you don't lick 'em. 14. Dogs will let you put a studded collar on, without calling you a pervert. 15. If a dog smells another dog on you, it won't kick you in the crotch; it just finds it interesting. And last, but not least: 16. If a dog runs off and leaves you, it won't take half your stuff. To verify these statements: Lock your wife and your dog in the garage for an hour. Then open the door, and observe who's happy to see you!
Peter ![[Linked Image]](http://bradley.it/public_images/drive.jpg)
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Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 266
Learner Plates Off!
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Learner Plates Off!
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 266 |
Magnificent! +1 .
I just wonder if I should show this to me wife...
Ah, I will make the garage check first ...
2015 4/4 "Chaplin" in black and white, usually strolling around at the german north sea shore
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