There is no pleasing my missus.
She's been nagging me for months to make a bird table.
Now She's got the ache because I put her in 4th place.

I keep having this dream that I'm a horse, 3 nights on the trot

I was going to tell you a joke about Covid.
I will have to wait two weeks to see if you get it.


Sad day today
Putting all my dogging gear up for sale on eBay.
No bids yet but there's 20 watchers

A man took a stuffed dog to Antiques roadshow.
"My word, how exciting" said the expert feller. "This is a particularly rare and collectible artefact. Do you have any idea what it would fetch if it was in original condition?"
"Erm, sticks?"