A good bloke never done anything wrong in his life and a bad bloke never done anything right in his life crash into each other and are killed.
In error the bad bloke goes up to heaven and the good bloke goes down to hell.

Up in heaven St Peter welcomes him at the gate and hands him a harp points to a cloud . He shouts "wheres the women the sex and the booze you old fart" St Peter is stunned trys to do it again and he shouts "any drugs and what about a betting shop and a brothel". St Peter is shaken but try's again with no luck every time he trys he gets the same and it just goes on and on for weeks .

Down in Hell the Devil grabs the other man and points , Booze in that room , gang bangs in that room over there and help yourself to the drugs have as much as you want " . He is shaken , " I only come here to work Sir " . The Devil say's this is Hell go on get as much sex drugs booze enjoy yourself have a gambol on the horses" . Again "sorry Sir "I only came to work I don't drink smoke or gambol " The Devil shakes his head and walk away .

Weeks are going by and nothing changes in both places . The Devil says " every time I ofer him fun he refuses there has to be a mistake , I know what I shall phone heaven ". He picks up the phone , " Hello is that Heaven ", "It is", "Is that the virgin Mary",
"It Was" . innocent